last post of 2011.

The last week has absoutely flown by, and I can't believe that now it's the last day of 2011. I always get rather miserable and nostalgic about the New Year and I do hate it, especially the seemingly required expectation to have fun. Which I never do... Anyway. Christmas has absoutely whizzed by, and has been full of ups and downs, but it's over now, as is this year. It's gone by so quickly, as have the last few months have gone. It all feels just like yesterday. Trying to think back on the last year and what I've done and what has happened. I don't want to get all reflective and nostalgic here, but I thought I would post and well, I don't really know what I wanted to say. I suppose it's that want to post something to acknowledge Christmas and the New Year.

The last week as always has whizzed by - it's that strange week in between Christmas and New Year where you eat a lot, hide inside, and in my case start reading all the hundreds of wondeful books I got for Christmas (which also meant I neglected twitter etc, not necessarily a bad thing, it was nice to have a break really). I also was able to enjoy the Doctor Who and Downton Abbey Christmas specials, which I thought were absoutely brilliant and marvellous. Good old Christmas TV. I saw friends which was lovely as wonderful and drank tonnes of tea (also usual). I started work again though a couple of days ago (after a sudden panic that I had an exam in two weeks) and wrote the first draft of the story I need to hand in which made me happy and feel like I have begun to achieved something. I think I can be quite harsh on myself... I can't say that I'm feeling all that refreshed but I have read some books I've been looking forward to reading for a while which made me very happy and excited. I also received a kindle for Christmas, and I am very excited to start using that properly (although there is no way I'm abandoning real books, but it's nice to have both options, and it means less books to carry around all the time... well, maybe....). I'm hoping next year will bring plenty more wonderful books to read and lots and lots of writing, among other things. I also hope to keep this blog going, and I wanted to say a hello to any new readers... I hope you stick with me, as I hope I stick with this!

I feel like there are lots of things I want to and should say but I can't quite at this moment put them into words so before I start babbling on anymore, I think I should say a belated Merry Christmas, and Happy New Year. I hope the next year is wonderful for everyone. Goodbye 2011; hello 2012.

Christmas Eve (Eve)

Well it's Christmas Eve tomorrow, and I don't think I've blogged since I got back. The last few days have been a whirlwind of activity - dentist appointments, preparations for Christmas, and seeing friends again. It's been great to see everyone again and catch up, and though it's weird to be home, it's been so busy getting everything ready for Christmas. I have been busy tidying and making mince pies (over 150!!!) and sorting everything out, and it's looking good now. I think we have everything just about ready.

Although, unfortuantely, it means that my work and writing has been abandoned. I haven't even been getting online much!! This afternoon I have the house to myself so I am sitting at the kitchen table and am going to attack it (after I've procrasinated a bit, checking twitter, tumblr, blogs... and you know... they'll probably come back any minute now...). Here we go....

the end of term.

So seminars are all finished, most of my housemates have gone, and I am sort of packed, the house is sort of tidied... it's the end of term.

The last couple of days have been busy with last seminars and watching films and doing Christmassy things and saying goodbye to people, which is always sad. It still doesn't feel like the end of term though. It all feels very strange, and I can't believe Christmas is in just over a week! Crazy. Am currently waiting for my family to arrive, and catching up with some strictly Harry excitment for the final tonight(which I will miss :( ) Have done a little bit of writing the last couple of days, which is good.

Just a short post this, but I also want to say a hello to everyone reading and following... thank you! Means a lot. Keep reading (I hope it's all interesting enough for you!) And do feel free to leave comments! :)

it's beginning to look a lot like Christmas...

Well, I don't know if it is really, but I only have one more seminar left this term (which is tomorrow) and then I have to pack and everything, and it all feels rather sad. I know it's geeky, but I'm really sad about my seminars ending this term. I have enjoyed them, especially creative writing, and it's sad to be at the end now. It sort of feels like Christmas, and sort of doesn't. We are having a 'house' christmas tonight, which should be good fun, and I have lots of Christmas cards, and have said lots of goodbyes, and been to carol services and all of that. I have wrapped presents, and just about done my Christmas shopping, nearly, and made mince pies and been Christmassy, and watched the Glee Christmas special (which was wonderfull awesome with lots of Blaine and Kurt), watched Christmas films, listened to Christmas music... maybe it will feel more like Christmas when I get home. Although I have so much to do when I get there... I just can't believe how close it is to Christmas!

This term has absoutely disappeared by. But it has been good, as I've already said, so I won't go into that again.

In other news, I have been working on a short story, and started another one, some of which will hopefully become my creative writing portfolio. I hope so anyway. I got my proposal back today too, which made me happy, because it went well! All good things...

reflecting.

Doing this more regularly makes me think abouthow much time I waste doing silly things, like messing around on twitter/tumblr/blogs etc, and how much time it is possible to spend youtubing Darren Criss and Starkid.

There are times when I'm so busy, with so much work to do that I think 'if only I had time to do some writing' and then when I have the time, I sit and mess around, or keep thinking 'I will do some soon... I will...' and then I get distracted by food or the internet or people or coffee or books or Darren Criss... and the list goes on... So many distractions! But that is my fault really I suppose... That's why i enjoy doing NaNoWriMo, because I feel compelled to write something every day and reach my target. And while at the minute, I feel there is writing I should do for creative writing, the deadline still feels a way off yet... Yet I've got to write a 4,000 word short story/words of short story, and edit it, and all that malarky, that I really need to start. I've been playing around with ideas. I've started revising for my other module. I've started thinking about rereading the texts I next to read for my disssertation over Christmas. I know what I have to do. It's getting down to doing it. I don't really know where this is going. Today I haven't done much work. I had a lecture, then a trip (one we had to go on for our creative writing fieldtrip... I'm not complaining, a trip to the beach is always welcome) and I'm aware that it is the end of term, and it's good to spend time with everyone, because the week is already going so quickly and I'll regret it otherwise, but I haven't stopped yet, and its nearly Christmas! I keep swinging from one mood to another, and well, this blog post is all one big excuse to procrasinate. I think I'm just trying to organise myself...

It's been a good term though. Of course it's had its ups and downs, and hasn't always been so cheery, but I have enjoyed my course and have spent some wonderful times with my friends. I've loved doing Creative Writing, more than I hoped, and love our class, and I also love my class for my other module, although I haven't always enjoyed that so much. I have loved getting on with dissertation ideas, and getting all that together, and talking to other people who are excited and enthuastic too, and I can't wait to write it. I have loved this place, as much as I ever do, and I have loved my friends, and everything I've done with them - all the lunches, and coffees and suppers, and times in the pub. It's been a good term really. Although, of course, it's still not over, and there's still much to be done... although, no more deadlines for this term, just a lot to get started with... And of course, the end of term means Christmas and going home, and I have mixed feeligns about all of that, as anyone who knows me would know. It's all crept up on me very quickly...

And now, I'm going to go and do some writing.

Whilst rewatching some Monarch of the Glen. *

*we were watching 'Balmoral' and it made me nostalgic... and it's nearly the end of term.... **

** I've also been doing loads of reading, but more of that later...

How quickly time goes...

I had some vague ideas for short stories a couple of days ago, which made me very happy - and I actually managed to write a 1,000 word short story yesterday which made me VERY happy indeed. *happy dance*. Oddly, revision seems to spark ideas, but I'm not complaining.

Feeling at the same time absoutely organised, but also swamped under and stressed out. What a wonderful feeling... But I have been seeing lots of wonderful friends and have been sociable, enjoying the last couple of weeks of term. I can't believe there's only one week left of this term! In a week I will be on my way home. Wow. Scary. But until then I've got annoying mundane things to do, and those sort of things which I should really sort out, but I don't really want to.

Still loving the title I came up with the other day, although I haven't worked any more on it, which is probably a good thing, to let it all rest the other day.

Anyway, better run now.

Although it will probably change.

TITLE.

I THINK I HAVE A TITLE.

I was looking back over notes and looking at titles I had doodled, and one hit me as the right title, and suddenly fitted when I was writing a summary, trying to figure this out.

I'm so happy. I can go to bed happy now!

Outlining.

So I did what I usually do: started writing, and then realised that actually I need to write a better outline than just 'chapter one' 'chapter two'. So, having got some words down, and a start, which I like, and also a voice which I like, I sat down to write a better outline and really plan this, so I had some idea of how to get everything in and make it go how I want it to go. Harder than it sounds.

Although, I did do this with Love Actually on in the background, so no wonder I was easily distracted. But I needed some Christmas cheer. Anyway, having seemed to have wasted the whole day* - I suppose I've done THINKING, and thinking is good, and an important part in writing I have realised, I dont' always have to be writing, but sometimes I just want to be. And at the minute I want to come up with some short stories for my CW portfolio. PLEASE INSPIRATION GODS.

So, as I say, usually I start writing and then realise I haven't thought enough/planned enough - apart from NaNo of course where I have to wait, and it's probably quite a good thing, having a deadline like that, although I find it hard to set one for myself, because I always think, well no, why don't I just start now? THIS IS WHY. I am learning. Anyway. It gets me the voice and the way I want it to sound. And it definitely helps to start. Otherwise I am a little stuck, vaguely knowing what I want the story to be and not sure how to tell it. But now I know. More anyway. Sort of. I think I'm going to type it up now and then stop staring at my computer screen....


*Although I have been doing general LIVING, which is always good.... I had breakfast with a friend, did some Christmas shopping, some reading, some messing about online, had a friend over for tea, more reading, looked through a file of academic work.... but it still doesn't feel very productive. At that loose stage of having handed in everything for this term, and its the last week and a bit, and I know I have work to start doing and I constantly feel like there is something I should be doing, but I don't know it, because I'm not entirely sure what IT is. I'll be freaking out in a few weeks, about the amount I have to do, I know I will. I also think, ahh I have the whole afternoon/evening to write. But I don't get as much done as I hoped. **

**That was rather long and irelevant. Sorry.

Evy and Violet

So I caved (to what, myself?) and began writing, what shall now be known as 'Evy and Violet' because I don't have the title for it yet and have no ideas - odd in itself as for the last few things I've done I've had the title from the start. Anyway, we'll see.
I already have 800 words. Not bad.
But we'll have to see what happens. I may end up abandoning it for a while. Or I may not. We shall see.... I'm still excited about it, at the minute, which is always a good sign. Although things I have yet to think about are already becoming apparent. It's all helpful though. There's only so much initial planning you can do.
Its a new adventure!
although everything else is looking at me rather mournfully saying 'edit me! edit me!' I'll get round to that... I promise. And the short stories... I will, I will.
Anyway, all very exciting!

Happy December!

So it is now December. I can't believe it really, and with that only a couple of weeks until the end of term - this time in two weeks I will be heading home. Strange.
It has been a busy few days, with Christmas parties, Arthur Christmas, Christingles, Carol Services.. all very festive, and as such I have no done much writing. I have thought about writing. I have been reading loads however. I went to the town library and got very excited in the teenage section and came away with: The Scorpio Races (Maggie Stiefvater), If I stay (Gayle Forman), Lament (also Maggie), Paranormalcy (Kierstein White) and Paper Towns (John Green) - many of which were books that I'd been interested in for a while and never expected the library to have. So a successful trip. I managed to race through them, and went back again yesterday and came away with: Ballad, the sequel to Lament, Shiver, and three Terry Prachett's. How very exciting. I love libraries, especially when you find lots of things you want to read. And clearly I am really getting into YA. Well, so far, I adore it. And why not? It's great fun and it counts as 'research' (ha... yeah). My housemates keep picking up whatever I'm reading and are like 'Faeries?' 'Vampires?' 'Werewolves?' Really? It seems I have swayed over to the paranormal stuff, just for a bit... I love both contemporary and paranormal and other stuff. It's just great writing.
Writing wise, I have been doing a lot of thinking about my next idea, and am very excited to start. I may just start and see what happens, becuase there's only so much initial thinking you can do, and I'm beginning to get restless, it being so long (well it seems it) since NaNo finished. But I am fully concious I need to come up with some good short story ideas soon, for my module and to be handed in in January. Although there's a holiday inbetween, my exam and deadlines aren't actually all that far away, which is oh so very exciting.
I also have a lot of editing to do.
But it's all fun.
Although, what with all the reading I've been doing and everything else, I am beginning to get that feeling that I NEED to write something...

Post NaNoWriMo life...

So yet again it has come to that time of year where life has settled back down to post NaNoWriMo, or supposedly has... Novemeber still hasn't come to an end yet and since finishing my draft (one important thing I've learnt over the years and in particular this year is that it is a DRAFT not a complete story or a novel. it still needs a hell of a lot of work) I have had to focus on getting my essay handed in and other bits and pieces like that.

I have also, very excitedly, been planning this other story, although it needs lots of detailed planning or it won't work so I'm trying to take it slowly and not rush into it. It's hard though. But I need a break (sort of.. I should really..) and I want to think about it for a bit.

I also have my previous story to edit and rework, and it will have been good to have a break from that.

Finished!

So I have completed NaNoWriMo for the year. YAY! I had 5,000 left this morning and decided to just go for it and finish it, which left me with an aching hand and also a feeling of guilt at the work I should have been doing, but I did feel good to finish it. I have to say I think I've finished earlier than usual, which is impressive, and although I did rush the last 5,000 and am definitely not as happy with them as I am with the rest of what I wrote I suppose that's a part of NaNo and it was going to happen. It definitely needs a lot of work, but I did it. I thought also that I would have enough story to take me way beyond the 50,000 mark, it turned out I didn't and struggled to get there in the last few hundred words - maybe that was psychological, I don't know, but it was rather annoying. It was probably becuase I was rushing to finish and although I kenw what I wanted to happen, didn't think about it enough. But why am I complaining? I have managed to write 50,000 words in 21 days, which is pretty impressive and I enjoy being able ot do that.
I have definitely improved so much since my first NaNo which was a pile of nonsense, and I actually (sort of) had enough story to get me to the end without throwing in a ridiculous plot.
Oddly, I didn't feel quite as happy and relieved as I should have done to finish. Maybe becuase I rushed it to get to the end, that feeling didn't come.
Oh well.
I still like my idea. I'm not sick of it. Good? Bad?
But at the same time I'm looking forward to getting back to editing my other project, and starting to plan my next one whilst giving this one a rest before I look at it again.
Also, the story changed completely from what I expected it to be, but that was quite exciitng, and the way I like it to be - where I vaguely know what I want to happen, but there's so much space for other stuff to happen that its exciting and not a stressful thing when you realise that will work better.
I have been enjoying Maureen Johnson's NaNo advice each day on her tumblr, it is very useful and I want to copy it and keep it all as inspiration. Really, go read it. So helpful.
In other news, I handed in a story today for CW that I really wasn't that happy with, but it had to do. My essay is nearly finished too. Yay!
My wrist is killing now, need to get off the computer, and go have supper.

Ideas and Dreams

I have a dream the other night which was so bizarre, but I kept remembering it and yesterday I suddenly thought of an AWESOME idea for a story which will be really interesting and exciting to write, and I'm already really excited about it.

Unfortuantely, it doesn't fit into my 500 word proposal I have to write, nor the story on the royal family I have to write (this is surprisingly hard - I always used to write about real people (fanfic) but writing it for something that has to be handed in is difficult). It doesn't fit into my NaNo story, nor my essay on Shakespeare (what a surprise there). Nor do I want to write it as a short story for my course.

So I'm just going to make lots of notes and keep thinking about it, and have something to look forward to writing when November is over....

Eleven days into November and I have already hit 30,000 words. I don't know where this burst of energy has come from, but I'm not complaining. I'm really not. It obviously means I like the story and I'm into it and it works. I suppose I have had more practice at writing this many words and it doesn't seem so much of a challenge anymore.
But it's still great to have a deadline and something to work towards doing.
All in all, it seems to be going well. So happy to be writing something huge again. Although lack of short story ideas for short fiction module is a little bit worrying...

things to do this November.

1. 3,000 word essay

2. short story proposal

3. lots of reading (a few plays and dissertation stuff)

4. write a novel

5. See people about dissertation

6. creative writing journal

it could be worse....

inspiration?

I spend a lot of my time writing, or thinking about writing, or reading. Which I suppose is only a good thing.

However, its just over a week until NaNoWriMo starts and I'm itching to start my idea. I want to start it now, so I'm stuck in that strange inbetween period, whilst editing other stuff, I don't really have anything I'm particuarly working on. Which saddens me because I want to be working on something. Yet in a week I will be starting something. I have tonnes of ideas for longer pieces, but nothing for anything shorter at the minute, and considering my creative writing module I'm taking this term is focused on short fiction I feel like I should be collecting some ideas for that and writing some short stories. Yet nothing is coming to me for that. I'm writing lots of background for my NaNo, and I know that's important, but it feels like it will all soon be irrelevant, when I could have been working on some short stories for later in the term. But I have nothing. I've tried just writing and I don't get anything I like. My head is too focused on all these other longer things I want to write, or am still editing.

Although I bet when it comes to it, I'll have loads of ideas for one and not for the other.

I just feel like I should be writing. But what?

editing, more writing and planning.

So I reached the end of the first draft. And then tried my best to leave it at least a week before looking at it again (which I managed). Having spent the last few days reading through a chapter or two when I've had time, noting anything which was inconsistent, I didn't like or needed to add, and I'm quite happy. Okay, so there's loads that I'm unhappy with and lots of adding in I need to do and things to change and all of that, but its there, there's a shell of something. And I like it. Sort of. Bits of it. Just a lot more editing to do. Fun times!

Whilst I've been doing that, I've also been doing various assignments for my creative writing module, and keeping up my writing journal for that. I usually keep a journal/notebook anyway so this isn't much of a hardship, and we had to do it for assessment purposes last year, so I'm well used to it. It is strange though what modes you find yourself stuck in. At the minute I'm struggling to do the assignment set for us, because it involves us really thinking about different 'writing modes' we use and being very aware of them. For some reason this makes it hard and my mind has gone blank on good ideas. Or what I perceive as good. The assignment for the first week however I found 'easy' and had an idea straight away. This is a little tougher. Around this I've found myself writing background for the next thing I was going to talk about.

Planning my NaNoWriMo novel for this year. The idea I'm going with this year is one that I thought quite a lot about over the summer and has been festering there for a few months now, so this seems like an opportune moment to write it, as I may never write it otherwise. I wasn't going to do NaNo this year, but after five years it has kinda become part of my routine for a November, and I can't imagine NOT doing it. And my good friend persuaded me to do it. Mainly because we always send each other packages and I didn't want to say no. I hadn't really thought about whether I was doing it this year until then. But hey ho, I am. And I can incorporate the stuff into my module this term. It will be good to develop characters and such. Good times.

Trying to finish this task at the minute, but watching AVPM at the same time is not particularly constructive.

ideas

I keep having loads of ideas for the story I'm writing at the minute. I even woke up last monday, itching to write, having gone to sleep thinking of various scenes, and to me that feeling was wonderful. I think I wrote about 5,000 words that morning. Of course no other morning have I quite had that feeling again.

Still, scenes are coming to me for this story thick and fast, and I keep imaginging them and then writing them down as they come, no matter if I skip over stuff knowing I'll have to go back and write those chapters. I'm going with the flow as it comes, and I love it.

This story has become so much more to me - I'm thinking about the characters all the time,w ondering what they will do.

Becoming a bit obsessed with this... but I suppose that's a good thing?!

Welcome to my new writing blog, where I hope to blog a little more about my various writing projects and ups and downs.

As I have many other blogs/have tried other blog sites I decided to try this one, and the curious thing was, as I used my email to log in I realised I'd already made a blog about three years ago (hence why my profiles dates from '08) and had written about four posts on it. I evidently gave up after not very long, and completely forgot about it, instead I think dedicating myself to livejournal instead. Still a curious thing to find, rather like finding old diaries (another thing I did the other day whilst having a sort out - I found some diaries I'd forgotten that I'd written that particular year). It was like a time capsule, finding a bit of myself here tidied away until I found it again.

I have now deleted that blog (copying the posts for memory) and updated my user profile as necessary.

Anyway, hopefully this is the beginning of another journey. Please join me!