I’ve completely lost track of the days and time recently, which perhaps is a luxury, but also rather disconcerting.
It's funny really, when you're in a town or a city, the seasons just change. It happens, and sure you notice it, but not in the same way. It's difficult to put my finger on just what it is that is different, but there's something.
It's the first autumn that I've been at home in six years? And before that it had been five years - except for the odd weekend here and there. It's different though, when you just come back for holidays, weekends, or "special occasions". Then everything is special, exciting, different, if you know what I mean. You just experience everything in a flash, a clip. Now, things are different - you see everything in a constant stream, like a panorama or something. It's nice to see it change slowly, and then all at once (I'm sounding like a quote from TIFOS now, sorry John Green. Oops).
But you see the gradual changes as well as the quick ones -such as the leaves all slowly turning brown, or all whizzing by the window on a particularly blustery day, or the continual rain falling down.
The evenings are getting darker now, the dark drawing in and even some of the afternoons are dark and gloomy. The wind is getting up too and from my window I can see it whipping through the trees.
It's welly weather, and dashing out in between rain showers, and huddling under duvets in the evening - although having said that, it's not all that cold yet - and bananas and custard, warming food eating weather.
Suddenly everything looks bare, like the facade of summer has been taken away, stripped away, leaving this,almost as if summer was nothing more than a shimmering illusion, just something to fool us for a while before it's gone again, and we're left waiting for it to come back. For now, we're going to have to find some autumn things to focus on.